A Normally Bad Mom

I found a website with Mom-isms.
I picked out the ones that I’ve said or thought about my kids.
Does this make me a bad or normal mom?
(Bold ones are ones I say All the time)

Are you deaf or something?
Are you lying to me?
As long as you live under my roof, you’ll do as I say.
Beds are NOT made for jumping on.
Did you brush your teeth?
Did you comb your hair?
Do you think I’m made of money?
Don’t make me get up!
Don’t pick that scab, it’ll get infected.
Don’t pick your nose in public.
Don’t run in the house.
Don’t sit too close to the television, it’ll ruin your eyes.
Don’t talk with your mouth full!
Don’t walk away when I’m talking to you!

Eat your vegetables, they’re good for you.
Enough is enough!

How do you know you don’t like it if you haven’t tasted it?
I can’t believe you can sleep in this filth!
I didn’t ask who put it there, I said “Pick it up!”
I don’t care what “everyone” is doing. I care what YOU are doing!
I don’t have to explain myself. I said no.
I hope someday you have children just like you.
I just want what’s best for you.
I will always love you – no matter what.

If you don’t do it NOW, then when are you going to do it?
If you’re too sick to go to school, you’re too sick to play on the computer.
I’m not going to ask you again.
Isn’t it past your bedtime?
Life isn’t fair.
Look at me when I’m talking to you.
Money does NOT grow on trees.
Over my dead body!
Pick that up before somebody trips on it and breaks their neck!
Pick up your feet.
Put that down! You don’t know where it’s been!
Say that again and I’ll wash your mouth out with soap.
Shut the door! I’m not heating (air conditioning) the entire neighborhood!
So it’s raining? You’re not sugar — you won’t melt.
Someone is going to end up crying.
This hurts me more than it hurts you.
Turn that racket (music) down!
Watch your mouth!
What did I say the FIRST time?
What if everyone jumped off a cliff? Would you do it, too?
What part of NO don’t you understand?
When I was a little girl…
When you have your own house then you can make the rules!
Where do YOU think you’re going?
Who do you think you’re talking to?
Wipe your feet!
You can’t find it? Well, if you’d put things where they belonged, you wouldn’t have this problem.
You don’t always get what you want. It’s a hard lesson, but you might as well learn it now.
You kids are trying to drive me crazy!
You’ll understand when you’re older.
A little soap & water never killed anybody.
Answer me when I ask you a question!
Are you going out dressed like that?
Be good.
Bored! How can you be bored? I was never bored at your age.
Clean up after yourself!
Did you clean your room?
Did you flush?
Don’t ask me WHY. The answer is NO.
Don’t cross your eyes or they’ll freeze that way.
Don’t EVER let me catch you doing that again!
Don’t make me come in there!
Don’t put that in your mouth, you don’t know where it’s been.
Don’t run with a lollipop in your mouth.
Don’t use that tone with me!
Don’t you have anything better to do?
Go ask your father.
Go to your room and think about what you did!
How many times do I have to tell you?
I can’t believe you did that!
I don’t care who started it, I said stop!
I don’t know is NOT an answer.
If I catch you doing that one more time, I’ll…
If I want your opinion I’ll ask for it!
If I’ve told you once … I’ve told you a thousand times.
If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.
If you don’t clean your plate, you won’t get any dessert.
If you’re too full to finish your dinner, you’re too full for dessert.
I’ll treat you like an adult when you start acting like one.
I’m going to give you until the count of three…
Is your homework finished?
I’ve had it up to here with you.
Leave your sister (brother) alone!
Look at this room! It looks like a pigsty!
Now, say you’re sorry…and MEAN it!
Running away? I’ll help you pack.
Think of those poor starving children in India… (or China, or Africa.)
When you have kids of your own you’ll understand.
Why? Because I SAID so, that’s why!
You are getting on my last nerve.
You had better wipe that smile off your face before I do it for you.
You just ate an hour ago!
You WILL eat it, and you WILL like it!
You will ALWAYS be my baby.
You’re going to put your eye out with that thing!
You’re the oldest. You should know better.

I sure hope, for everyone one of those things I said at least one “I Love you” too. But now I’m starting to wonder. What a wake up call.

SIgh.

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3 Comments

Filed under Family Life

3 responses to “A Normally Bad Mom

  1. Kim

    Hehe, do I hear an echo? These are too funny. You’re not a bad mom at all, just a very typical one!

  2. These are so cute! How old are your children? I ask because I’ve used sooooo many more of those “isms” to my sons, but they are adults now (and I still use some of them). I read this on a scrapbooking board yesterday: “The most important thing she learned is that there is no way to be a perfect mom and a million ways to be a great one.” I’ll bet you are a great mom!

  3. KeanaLee

    Those were great but I think you for got one that alot of us knitters say all the time, or at least I do….
    “Hold on a sec, just let me finish this row & I’ll be right there.”

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